


This Is the Thing

by ModestlyRogue



Category: Larry - Fandom, Larry Stylinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Harry Styles - Freeform, Harry and Louis - Freeform, Last words, Liam - Freeform, Liam Payne - Freeform, Louis Tomlinson - Freeform, Louis and Harry - Freeform, Love Confessions, M/M, Niall Horan - Freeform, One Shot, Sad, Sad AU, Unknown Love, Zayn Malik - Freeform, angsty, cry - Freeform, harry - Freeform, i didnt know what else to do, im sorry, larry - Freeform, larry au, larry fic, larry one shot, larry stylinson - Freeform, niall - Freeform, onde direction, sad fic, zayn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-29
Updated: 2015-10-29
Packaged: 2018-03-15 22:33:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3464510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ModestlyRogue/pseuds/ModestlyRogue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where things are left unsaid.</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Is the Thing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [backwards](https://archiveofourown.org/users/backwards/gifts), [disclosedthoughts](https://archiveofourown.org/users/disclosedthoughts/gifts).



> I don't know if you notice anything different.  
> It's getting dark and it's getting cold and the nights are getting long  
> And I don't know if you even notice at all  
> That I'm long gone
> 
> And the things that keep us apart  
> Keep me alive  
> And the things that keep me alive  
> Keep me alone  
> This is the thing
> 
> I don't know if you notice anything missing  
> Like the leaves on the trees or my clothes all over the floor  
> And I don't know if you even notice at all  
> 'Cause I was real quiet when I closed the door
> 
> And the things that keep us apart  
> Keep me alive  
> And the things that keep me alive  
> Keep me alone  
> This is the thing
> 
> And I don't know if you notice anything different  
> I don't know if you even notice at all
> 
> This is the thing
> 
> -Fink

**Work Text:**

"Harry, baby, Louis is on his last conditions and is on his last minutes of life. His doctors said that he isn't responding well on the medicine and treatments they are giving to him. Harry please come, we’re at Juards Clinic he needs yo-" Harry clicked. His mind goes blank, the only thing stuck in his head was the hospitals name and Jay's voice saying Louis needs him. He starts rushing to his car, his hands trembling, his heart racing a million beats per minute, his palms sweaty and white, the blood rushing hotly throughout his body.

“This can’t be happening,” he wailed. His hazy eyes burning, finally giving out and letting the tears fall down, giving out a dull, gray color. His crying became loud, his bottom lip slipping in-between his teeth. Eyes glued on the street, mind rushing with millions of things now. Not him. Why now?

Busy streets, heavy rain, and thoughts. Harry was struggling staying focus on the road, struggling to remember the way to the hospital since he hasn't been there since last year, when he had to go look at his mom for having a twisted ankle.

Coming up to a red light, Harry cursed, "Fuckfuckfuckfuck!" He slurred out, his lips wet, his eyes glossy, cheeks puffy and red, his heart racing. The urge to go see how Louis was managing was killing him. He didn't want to know what his condition was, but he did know Louis was strong. He believed in him.

**

“I-I'm Harry Styles, I was told to come here. My bo-, uhm, my friend, Louis. Louis Tomlinson.” Harry urged, his hands pushing back his brown curl, damp of the shower he just took. His lips formed a thin line, his heart beat going at an unusual speed, his vision failing on him just a bit, his head snapping up as he heard the lady start talking.

“Yeah, Mr. Tomlinson will be found in the 4th floor, room 49D. He's not taking vis-,” and with that, Harry was off. Nothing more he had to hear. He just wanted to get to Louis and be by his side. Looking at the door numbers impatiently, tripping over his own feet -which for his case was not really a weird thing, he always did it - finally finding Jay outside along with Niall and Liam, Louis' dorm room mates.

“Harry, honey, thank you so much for coming.” Jay cried, joy shining through her eyes very lightly, but Harry noticed.

“I wouldn't have just stayed home with my ass on the couch not caring about Louis. He's my Lou after all.” Harry spoke, a smile rising, a hand reaching up to wipe away a falling tear.

“Oi mate, you look like a mess.” Niall grinned, his cheeks red as his eyes complemented his lips imitating them with a cheery like color and a shade of gray. ' _So he's been crying, too._ ' After all, he's the one who saw Louis faint back at their dorm, his face slowly losing its color. His words slurring out, his legs giving up and his body falling on the floor. Niall panicked, his only decision was to call the closes one he knew with a car, which was Liam. Liam arrived in just seconds; after all, he was only at the cafe a hall away from the dorm. Once they had arrived at the hospital, Jay was called and that's when Jay called Harry.

“Yeah, finding out a huge piece of your life is hanging by a thread isn't soothing.” Harry smiled out, his words coming out very lazily since his crying made his throat burn a little. ' _A drink of water wouldn't hurt_ ,' he thought. 'But not now.'

“I get ya'. Seeing him was a heart breaker. He looked so … weak. I don't know, I've never seen him like that,” Liam mumbled out, loud enough for Harry and Niall to hear him. His eyes focused on the floor below him, his hands crossed over his chest.

“It scared me. He looked so white,” Liam nodded. His eyes going up to meet Harry's red and puffy eyes. “And so dead.” Niall added, his bottom lip immediately being sucked in between his teeth, his hands slipping into his sweats pockets. Jay was seating down on one of the blue chairs outside the door. Her hands cupped up covering her face. Small muffled tears were heard, but Harry decided it was best if he let her have her moment.

“Okay,” Said the doctor Harry had just seen walking towards the service table, a clipboard on his hand, a smile on his face. He was just coming out of the room Louis' was in, making Harry, Niall, and Liam look up at the doctors eyes with hope and sadness, Jay coming up behind Harry placing a soft hand on his shoulder.

“Looks like Mr. Tomlinson well be staying on our watch over night. His records show he has been on his last stage for over three months and this seems to be his last minutes of life. You can all go in and talk to him, but he will not be able to talk back and it has to be one visitor at a time. The time to spend with him is unlimited. There's not much time. I'm so sorry.” He spoke out with a sappy tone. ' _Pft, yeah right. Sorry my ass_.' Harry and Jay burst out into tears , the heartbreaking news making them both weak, their hands not even strong enough to come up to their face to cup it. Niall and Liam silently cried as they took a seat on the chairs, Liam's head resting against the wall, Niall holding his head up with both his hands, the tears dripping off of his chin.

“Did I miss anything?” Zayn spoke out, his words dry.

“No mate. He- he has a few hours maybe even minutes left. He's leaving Zayn.” Harry cried silently, his eyes not leaving the door that covered the view for them to see Louis. Zayn sat down next to Harry, placing a hand on his back.

“Harry,” he spoke with a very dry voice, maybe he was tired, or maybe he was smoking, but his voice was almost never dry. Harry looked up to find a tear on Zayn's cheek, his eyes still crystal, his hair perfect , but Harry figured he had also gotten hit hard by Louis' new, “he'll be alright. Don't give up. Anything can happen. He still has a chance to live. May not be high, but still. You should go talk to him.”

Harry nodded, wiping a tear away, “S' just hard you know? But I will, after they all have talked to him though, I have a lot of things to tell him.” Harry sighed, and boy did he have a lot to say. Everything, really. He had to tell Louis everything. Zayn just nodded, understanding Harry's words. Niall and Jay had both gotten the chance to talk with Louis. Harry was only getting more scared by the faces they had once they had walked out. They looked dead, lifeless, pale, and just amazed by everything. Harry was scared. He didn't want to see how Louis was because he thought it would be heart breaking, but in the same time, he thought he would be a horrible person if he didn't just suck it up and go in to talk with him.

Zayn was back from the cafe with hot chocolate and a hot coffee with hazelnut flavored crème for Harry.

“Thanks.” Harry mumbled, receiving a soft ‘ _you’re welcome_ ’ from Zayn.

“Are you scared?” Harry asked, his fingers playing with the cover of the coffee. Zayn looked at him with a serious face.

“Scared of what?” Harry looked at him. Zayn was just finishing drinking out of his cup when he received a nod from Harry, his eyebrows furrowing.

“About him," Harry stopped and looked at Zayn, " _dyeing_?” Harry shivered at the thought and the words finally slurring out, getting out of his system. Zayn shuffled in his seat, his eyes focusing on Harry's.

“I am. I can't lie. He helped me with a lot. He helped me stop cutting, he gave me a place to stay at when I needed one and I was a dick about it. He's the brother I never had,” Zayn sobbed out, his eyes getting watery, a smile forming up on his lips, “but to know that I'll probably never see him again, not ever, not after I told him I hated him, Harry, I don't want him to die. I can't see myself without him in my life. He kept me grounded, gave me something to look forward to every day when I woke up even though I felt like it'll be a drag of a day. I love him so much, I can't just, and I can't let him die on me. He can't die.” Harry nodded a smile on his lips.

“Yeah, he's an angel. He has a vast heart. He's strong, too. I know this. Zayn, don't you ever feel like Louis never thought you didn't love him. He knows you love him, he can feel it, and I know he can. Louis talked to me a lot about you, how you tried playing a prank on him, but failed because you made it obvious with your giggling, how you fucked up the bed sheets when doing the laundry. Zayn, you're a huge part of his life, if anything happens, anything, he will always know you love him.” he looked up to find Liam walking out of the room, tears all over his sweater, a faint smile on his face.

“Welp, I'm next,” Zayn grunted getting up.

“Then it's you Styles.” Zayn patted Harry's back.

“Don't remind me.” he scoffed, and with that Zayn was already walking in, the thought of what Zayn had just said was replaying in his head. _'I'm next._ ' Harry thought. He would tell him everything he kept from him, everything he wished to tell him, everything he didn't know and things he did know but Harry denied to not making things complicated.

Harry was about to tell Louis everything.

Everything he had bottled up.

Every emotion he had tucked very far away in his heart.

He was going to tell Louis he loves him.

**

“You're turn.” Zayn sighed, his index finger wiping a tear from his face.

“It's very hard seeing him like that, Harry. Be strong. For him.” Zayn spoke softly, his hand on Harry's shoulder. Harry couldn't have been more obvious. He was scared. Not nervous, but scared. His tanned skin was very pale, palms were very sweaty, his eyes were shifting everywhere at a very rapid paste, he was just scared. Harry looked over at Niall and Liam laughing at something, but worry still written all over their crinkled eyes and red cheeks. They just seemed torn inside and out. Harry noticed that Jay was gone, and he check his phone. ' _10:48 pm 9 New Messages, 45 Missed Calls.'_ Harry flinched and opened the message app. He notices that 2 were from his mom and 4 were from Jay. The rest were from Niall and Liam from earlier that day.

“Harry, honey, please tell Louis I'm so sorry I can’t make it and that I hope he gets better! xx”

“Also that I love him and will pray for him. We all are. Stay strong love xx.” Harry smiled. His mom always worried about Louis. And all of his friends too, but mostly Louis. He didn't reply, but made a mental note to tell Louis what Anne wanted him to know.

“I have to take care of the girls for the night! If Louis reacts in any way, please call me and let me know!”

“If you guys get hungry don't hesitate on calling. I’ll get you guys some good food. “

“Liam and Niall have the new house number just in case you can’t reach my cell.”

“Oh, last thing, take care love. Louis loves you and he always will. Remember, Louis and Harry forever xx.” Harry couldn't help but smile at the last message. Harry knew, but it felt good knowing that people knew. Harry took in a deep breath, his heart race accelerating at the thought of being with Louis after so long.

“Good luck, mate!” Niall wished, his arms wrapping Harry into a hug.

“It'll be 'right, mate.” Liam assured him, his chin pressing onto Harry's shoulder. “Thanks.” Harry half smiled. His hand was already on the door knob, turning it to open, a foot stepping in, hesitant, not ready. Harry cleared his throat, his eyes shifting to an empty black chair and a painting hanging on the wall, the white walls standing silently. His head snapped back to the closing door, blinking furiously, his sight not landing onto Louis just yet. Harry breathed for a few. He could feel Louis' presence. His trembling hands came up to rub his face. A heavy sigh was let out and that was when he looked at Louis. His skin was pale, his hair was dull, no shine, the brown was gone. Dark circles were under his eyes, his lips were colorless. Harry couldn't help it. He lost it at the sight. His eyes washed out, tears falling rapidly on the floor as his ears ring with the sound of the Defibrillator. Louis wasn't moving, but he was breathing. This made Harry grow a curved smile, wandering Louis’ whole body with his eyes. He walked over to the chair next to the bed, his hands aching while he was pushing the chair back a bit for him to fit.

His throat was dry; his eyes were losing their ability to stay focused, “Hey Lou. It's Harry.” he starts. And he feels it in him that this is going to be quite the confession.

“I-I know that you can hear me, at least I hope you can. If you can, well I can only imagine what you are thinking of telling me. Probably thinking that I'm a prick, a twat even. But I can explain why I disappeared like that almost a year ago.” Harry explained, his hands on his thighs, playing with his fingers as he shed a couple tears, not wanting to wipe them away, but let them fall by their selves.

“Let’s go all the way back to when we met. You remember right? I can just play it over my head millions of times if I wanted. ” Harry smirked, looking at Louis with such a soft face, his tears still strolling down his puffy, pale cheeks. His memory started going back to how Louis and he met.

**

Harry was out on an early jog, his usual jog that is, and decided to go through a curved street he always saw while heading towards the liquor, his resting destination. He was jogging when he noticed that all the houses looked nothing how the others were down in the usual street he jogged. They looked more posh, and they all looked different to each other, but they were all so big. He noticed one house in particular. It was less dramatic than the others. It was a white simple house. Yeah, it still had about 4 balconies, and about 6 stairs to the front two doors, but it was very modernly old. It was nice. He was in awe when he noticed that one of the windows behind one balcony had a huge moral of Arctic Monkeys, which was only his favorite band, with his ultimate man crush Alex Turner. He stared at the window, his eyes flicking to the colorful swirls the letters had, his smile was reaching to both of his ears, his dimples were deep, which meant he was just blown away, until he noticed the window opening in just seconds. He tried to look away, but when he caught sight of the guy, he was left motionless. He was wearing a gray beanie, red sweats and a gray shirt. He was built, from what he could see, and his eyes. Harry loved his eyes. They were a crystal blue. Harry smiled, his cheeks getting flushed as the guy took sight of him. A notepad was on his hands, a pencil on the other. “Hi.” Harry heard, his eyes blinking furiously at the soft voice. It was beautiful to him.

“You're new in the neighborhood?” Louis asked. He was setting up a desk he had outside, placing the notepad on the desk, shuffling around tin cans with paintbrushes and colored pencils, and placing a big brown box that he grabbed from the floor on the edge. Harry didn't reply. His eyes still focused on Louis' figure.

“So let me guess,” Louis started, his elbows placed on the rail of the balcony, hands cupping his face, ' _so beautiful,'_ Harry thought, “you're just running around checking up people’s houses, taking note which house will be your next witness for robbery?” Louis blurted out, his eyes fixed on Harry's green orbs, his smile growing as he took notice that Harry was turning pale, the pink from his cheeks going away.

“N-no no. I-I only came to run a few miles around this area an-. I'm sorry, I'll go.” Harry stuttered, turning around ready to run back out of the marvelous street.

“I won't call the cops if that's what you're running away from. I'll let it slide since you're quite an attractive lad.” Louis teased, his laughter making Harry jerk his head around and flash a smile at him. Harry was just turning his gaze back around when he noticed he was inches away from a trash bin and in just seconds he was hugging the bin, falling on the floor with the bin clung over his arm.

“Shitshitshit.” he mumbled, his cheeks turned a bright shade of pink. _Why did his clumsiness decide to make a special appearance at this moment?_ He hated his clumsiness.

“Might want to keep your eyes on the direction you're walking at next time. Don't want that face of yours to get bruised.” Louis yelled from the balcony, his smile so big, reaching both ears, the crinkles near his eyes, and Harry swore that for that moment he thought he was an angel, a literal angel.

“You know, for a posh kid, you sure have a lot of bravery to talk to a criminal.” Harry smiled as he let out those words out, his voice loud enough for Louis to hear.

Louis looked down, his hand coming up to move a piece of his fringe away from his face, “What can I say? I'm one of the tough guys around here. Keeping a watch on my neighborhood.” He winked, causing Harry to smile that dimple on and his eyes sparkling, enough for Louis to notice. Harry turned back around, starting to feel this tingle in his stomach as he was walking away, feeling Louis' eyes still on him.

“I'm Louis by the way!” Harry smiled, turned around once more to find Louis waving him off, and Harry waved back.

“And I'm Harry.” As soon as he placed his hands on his sides, Louis hollered, “Harry the criminal. Got it.” A thumbs up from Louis and a small giggle from Harry ended Harry's journey to the new street. He made a mental note to run down that street every morning.

So it continued. Harry running down the beautiful hidden street, slowing down near Louis' house, which was not creepy at all for his thinking, and seeing Louis on the balcony, or out on the fountain. Casual conversations were a usual thing by the third day he ran by. Until December 13th.

On that day Louis told Harry he had a secret. But he wasn't going to tell him yet.

“You'll know when I’ll be able to tell you. It'll be maybe two years from now or even one year. My mom will call you and that's how you will know, it's time. I'll be able to explain everything and some stuff. You're a great friend, but I just can’t tell you now.”, was all Louis said and Harry understood.

They have been talking since January 13 of the previous year, which was about to be two years in just a month. In those two years, they started going to Manchester University and that's where they met Liam, Niall, and Zayn. Everything was going great.

Until one day when Harry and Louis had a fight.

**

Louis wasn't even drunk and he brought a guy back to his dorm in the university they all had gone to since it was close to town. The door was open with Louis' hands tangled in the guy’s hair, desperate catches of air were muffled around and Harry saw everything. He knew Louis' wasn't, but it was a very unusual thing. He never brought guys home and snogged them and Harry couldn't take it. He tried to stop it, but Louis only protected the guy, saying he's known him since middle school and they have had a thing before. Harry got his car keys, his phone and his jacket and he was gone. He didn't know Louis' secret still. A year passed and Harry was back in town, looking for Louis' forgiveness, and that's when he got the call. His mind going back to that very moment when Louis had told him that he would know his secret on the day his mom would call him. Harry looked at Louis with wide eyes as his tears finished falling off his cheeks, realizing that now he would find out what Louis' secret was.

**

Harry was looking at Louis on the hospital bed, his eyes water, his hands holding Louis' hand in his,

“I-. Louis,” he breathed out, “I'm so sorry for leaving you. I had gone over to my moms and she thought I needed a break. A little break. I didn't want to leave you alone, clueless as to where or why I left. I wanted to call you, but I always thought you'll ignore me or just ask for explanations and I couldn't tell you. Not through the phone, I couldn’t.” Harry shifted on the chair, his hands cupping Louis' one hand, a tear escaping from his eyes, “Why did you keep it from me? I wouldn't have left you. God, I would never do anything to hurt you.” Harry sobbed, his head digging onto the bed.

“Louis, you have leukemia and you never planned on telling me this while you were fine? When you were happy and good to go every day? Louis why didn't you?” Harry questioned Louis, wishing he could hear him. His heartbeat was normal, his breathing was very neutral, and he just looked... pale. Harry dug his head in between Louis' hand, his forehead touching the cold and sweaty palm of Louis', his sobbing being muffled against the hospital bed. A twitch of his hand made Harry open his eyes and stare at the bed, too close to his face, keeping him from breathing correctly. A shuffling noise from the bottom of Louis' blanket making Harry grow a smile, a hand coming up to pat wipe away his own tear. Louis was moving and Harry was witnessing it. Louis was awake and he knew Louis had heard.

“Lou?,” Harry spoke, his eyes shifting from his face to his moving legs, “Louis, it's me Harry.” Harry smiled, his tears rolling down faster and much fuller than before. Louis' throat was dry; his eyes were closed, seeing the light through his eyelids, his hands, cold and sweaty up against Harry's big, warm hands.

“Haz,” Louis spoke, his voice shaking, his lungs struggling to catch a decent breath, “Hazza, turn of the light.” Louis croaked, his left hand pointer finger pointing at the light about him , the once causing him to avoid opening his eyes, letting him see the one person he's been dying to see the most in a year.

“Ye-yeah sure.” Harry replied, his back leaning on the chair, his arm reaching to the wall not so far away from him, switching the light off, leaving two more on. Harry went back to his previous position, his hands hesitating on whether or not he should hold Louis' once again.

“Are you okay? A-are you feeling well, want me to call a doc-”

“Haz,” Louis spoke, making Harry stop, and just pay attention to every word Louis had to say.

“Haz, I heard you.” Harry frowned, his eyes sniffing back and forth, from the door to the hospital bed, ignoring Louis' face.

“Harry, look at me.” Louis said, his arm reaching up to touch Harry's cheek causing Harry to jerk a bit, but easing into the touch very smoothly. Harry's eyes landed on Louis' and Harry saw something in his eyes he's never seen before. Regret. Loads and loads of regret and secrets.

“I know why you left,” Harry stiffened, his head jerking to the side, his eyes still focused on Louis’.

“I know you needed time, but I understand. I did too.” Harry swallowed, noticing that Louis did too also need the same.

“But you,” Harry asked, “why did you need time? Louis, I-”

“Because,” Louis interrupted,

“Harry I was confused.” he chuckled, his hands now cupping Harry's cheek. Harry stared blankly at him, not wanting to ask questions, but just let them get answered on their own.

“I’ve always slept with guys, ever since I was 17. I always figured there would be something I never felt with a girl. I had a few nights here and there, experimenting, and it was always a thing I kept from you guys.” Louis explained.

“Harry, that night... I had no idea that you guys were going to be home. I had the silly idea to just catch up with my old friend, have a nice chat, and go to his place, but his mates were there so we went to mine. One thing led to another and I know it wasn't the way I wanted you to find out I was gay, I was going to let you guys know, but I was always scared you guys would have judged me.” Harry stared at Louis with sad eyes. His heart melting at every word Louis was saying because he would never judge Louis. Not ever.

“Lou, I would ne- we would never judge you. Louis we love you and we would accept you no matter what. We still love you, all of us. In fact, the rest are outside worried sick about you.” Harry smiled, his nose stuffy.

“Louis, you shouldn't have worried about us judging you, you should have known it would have made not one difference in anything.” Louis stared at Harry with blank eyes, His lips chapped, but curved into a small smile, his eyes were watery.

“But one thing,” Harry continued, “Why didn't you tell me you had leukemia?”

Louis' hand quickly dropped down to hold Harry's hand in his, “I didn't want an excuse for you to stay with me.” Louis said truthfully.

“I didn't want the idea of me having cancer forcing you to stay with me no matter how mad you were with me. It didn't seem fair to me.” Louis’ eyes glassed up, the tears in his eyes beginning to stroll down his beautiful soft face as he saw Harry nod slowly at his words.

“Lou, nothing would have forced me!” Harry choked out. Louis' grip on his hand became tighter, causing Harry to move in closer.

“Harry, you remember that one night in the lake? Our second year together as best friends? August 6?” Louis asked, his thumb tracing Harry's cross tattoo. It was new, in fact he noticed Harry had other tattoos as well, but the cross was in reach, he'll ask about the tattoos later. Harry looked at Louis' with a puzzled look, the memory coming back.

“Hemming Lake. The one down in Olympic Street.” Harry and Louis smiled, the memories of that night flushing in.

“Yeah I do remember, but why?”

“Just making sure.” Louis smiled. The heart rate tracker started beeping, Louis' eyes closing shut, his lungs burning, his heart racing more than normal speed. Harry panicked, his eyes going crazy, about to yell out for help when he noticed that Louis was laughing lightly. Harry sat back down; his eyes were full of terror as he looked at the monitor.

“Harry, I have to tell you another secret.” Louis begun, his eyes now closed, his mouth dry, his body weaker than ever. Harry just stared.

“Harry, since March 4, 2011, I've been in love with you.” Harry's heart stopped for a second, his eyes growing wide, Louis' eyes slowly opening just as much as he could open them, turning his lips to a wide smile. The widest Harry has seen in a while.

“That's why I was sleeping with other boys. To get over you somehow, with someone. I didn't think you'll love me. No one ever has.” Louis whispered out, his voice dying on him, making Harry's eye tear up, he knew it was close.

“Louis I-,”

“Harry, I love you. I always have and I always will.” Louis smiled, his eyes looking up at Harry’s, “Always in my heart, Harry Styles.” Harry took his hand in his and cried. His mind beginning to run over all the times Louis tried to make it obvious, all those times becoming very clear now. Harry looked at Louis' pale, pale face.

“Oh Louis, I never knew.” Harry chocked, his tears getting all over his shirt. Harry thought, and in just seconds he knew he had to say it. He's been keeping it from him for two years. Two years of Louis being clueless. Harry placed his hand over Louis' warm head, passing his fingers gently through his hair.

“Louis, I- I lo-”, beeping monitors, the Defibrillator blasting with a very high pitched noise, doctors running into the room with clipboards and panic all over their face.

“1-2-3 pump!” the doctors yelled using the Defibrillator. Harry's eyes ran around in fear.

“What's going on!?” Harry yelled, his eyes getting red and foggy, his sight failing on him, the tears making it impossible for him to see clearly. His hand grip on Louis only got tighter, watching the doctors do their thing.

“What is going on!?” Harry cried this time, his sobbing coming out loud, his eyes shutting trying to ignore what's going on, wishing Louis would be better.

The Defibrillator dropped the noise, a single beat spreading throughout the room, “Time of death, 12:39 am. Cover him.”

Harry felt his heart break into a million pieces, his face digging into Louis' chest, not a single noise escaping until, “Why!?” He yelled out, his eyes shutting tighter, the tears falling rapidly onto Louis shirt.

“Jesus Louis!” Niall cried out, his eyes red, a sharp pain stinging them when he openes to them to see Louis, his cheeks red, his lips pale.

“Oh, Louis.” Liam cried , his hands covering his mouth , his eyes shut, Zayn running in with Jay the tears dripping down their chins, the breathes being quick.

“Baby, baby, no! Louis! Mommy’s here. You’ll be okay child, you’ll be just fine. You’re going to a much peaceful place now. You don’t have to worry; you’re in god’s hands now. I love you so much, Louis. God, I love you. ” Jay cried her hands tracing Louis' still face, his pale face.

“The room will have to become vacant. We're going to cover up the body.” One of the doctors spoke above all the sobbing, Niall and Zayn being the first ones out, Liam following as he gave Louis a kiss on his forehead. Harry walked out last, leaving Jay behind. They all cried for hours, the sadness and heartbreak not leaving one minute, not once did they speak to each other, and it's been 8 hours.

**

Two weeks and three days later, it's Louis funeral.

Niall, Liam, Zayn, and Harry participating in carrying the coffin along with some of Louis' family. The walk down to the dug up whole being a long one, their eyes were black from under the lid, their lips were pink and chapped, their cheeks were red, their chest still full of the same pain they felt that night. An hour of talking and twenty minutes of sobbing, and everyone was gone. Leaving Harry alone with Louis' coffin under his feet and his gravestone in his sight reading ' _Louis William Tomlinson 1991-2015: Just enjoy life to the fullest. We're young, mind as well'_. Harry shook his head, his index finger wiping a tear away. He got close to the gravestone, the sight of multicolored roses and tulips filled the covered ground. Harry breathed and shut his eyes, his hand coming with contact with an empty spot near the gravestone. He placed one hand on the stone, his knees bent.

A smile forming on his lips, bringing a red rose up to his lips planting a simple kiss on it, and placing it down, shutting his eyes whispering, “I love you too, Louis. Always in my heart, Louis Tomlinson.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> im not even sorry. lololol
> 
> FYI :  
> MY GRAMMAR HERE IS SHIT AND I'M WORKING ON IT IM SO SORRY OH I HOPE YOU UNDERSTOOD STILL.


End file.
